❜ I thought you dead! ❜
Her voice snarled as she turned on her heel, anger evident on her face. She had thought that Natasha had died and she had mourned her, pulling in on herself like she always did when confronted with the death of someone she cared about. Her arms hung uselessly at her sides as she stared at the red haired woman in front of her.
She could still remember how her heart had broke, shattered, when she had watched Natasha be shot. For hours afterwards, she had thought that Natasha would call and say it was all a lie, people in their line of business always went dark in the most dramatic way and she could not be sure that that wasn’t what Natasha had done. But then days had passed, her funeral had come and gone and Claire had gotten the message loud and clear that Natasha was dead, she was not coming back.
Because if she was not, wouldn’t Claire be the first time know?
But apparently that wasn’t true. Nadia proved that. Despite their closeness, despite everything they had meant to each other, Natasha had lied about her own death. Natasha had kept something so important from her, knowing how much Claire would blame herself, how much Claire would mourn her and it felt like a slap to the face. Though she felt joy in knowing that Natasha wasn’t truly dead, it was impossible to concentrate on those emotions. Never before had she felt such betrayal, not even Jacques betrayal had hurt her as much, as much as it had hurt. She turned her head from Natasha, she could hardly look at her.
❜ I thought I had lost the only true friend I had. I was
racked with guilt and tears and I cried for so many
hours. I wanted to quit, I wanted to run away from
all this and go back to Iowa! ❜
Her words echoed off the empty street and she was thankful that the streets weren’t busy. She felt tears prick at her eyes. She shook her head, unsure of what to say, where to go. She had been lucky to catch Natasha during her surveillance of her and while Claire could feel a bit of joy in knowing that Natasha had opted to keep, it did nothing to temper than hurt and betrayal she felt.
❜ If you wanted to protect me, you would’ve no,
should’ve, told me what I needed to know in order
to protect myself, not lie to me. ❜
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